Friday, June 26, 2009

Aghosh, here are your highest rated friends!

i was pleasantly surprised to see this mail from my friend aghosh, sitting in my inbox on an early thursday morning :)

From: Compare People
Date: Thu, Jun 25, 2009 at 7:38 AM
Subject: Aghosh, here are your highest rated friends!
To: Aghosh Babu

Highest ranked in each category

* "Who is more useful"
1. Kristopher Noronha
2. Sriram Govind
3. Frincy Clement
view more>>

* "Who is better at science"
1. Kristopher Noronha
2. Anuja Bagul
3. Sriram Govind
view more>>

* "Who is more tech-savvy"
1. Kristopher Noronha
2. Sriram Govind
3. Anuja Bagul
view more>>

* "Who is more generous"
1. Kristopher Noronha
2. Anuja Bagul
3. Renu Vijayachandran
view more>>

* "Who is a happier person"
1. Kristopher Noronha
2. Frincy Clement
3. Darsan Muraleedharan
view more>>

This email was sent by Compare People.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Reminder: Kristopher invited you to join Facebook...

facebook has been sending these mails out on my behalf. i know because i'm on my own address book.

and my address book was accessed by facebook exactly once, when i first signed up two years ago.

i somehow don't remember agreeing to let them use my contact list, much less invite *all* my contacts. and definitely not two years later.

Hi Kris,
The following person recently invited you to be their friend on Facebook:
Kristopher Noronha Kristopher Noronha
569 friends
415 photos

Other people you may know on Facebook:
Aditi Mallya Aditi Mallya
Bokul Bhowmick Bokul Bhowmick
Priyadarshini Goswami Priyadarshini Goswami
Jadavpur University
Aarti Naik Aarti Naik
Shakti Salgaokar Shakti Salgaokar
Martin Fernandes Martin Fernandes

Facebook is a great place to keep in touch with friends, post photos, videos and create events. But first you need to join! Sign up today to create a profile and connect with the people you know.
The Facebook Team
Facebook is free and anyone can join.
Sign Up
This message was intended for ________________. If you do not wish to receive this type of email from Facebook in the future, please click here to unsubscribe.
Facebook's offices are located at 1601 S. California Ave., Palo Alto, CA 94304.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

long live god!!!

elevator conversation, a few days ago:

t: i swear on god i'm gonna start jogging today!
k: please don't say that...god might die tomorrow!!!

Monday, June 08, 2009


i used to pride myself on not being a fanboy. i was the sorta fellow who would accept everything on its merits, and poke fun at those who didn't. ego-shredding sarcasm was reserved for people who defended their fanboyism.

not anymore.

today, during #WWDC, i realised how much of an anti-apple fanboy i've become. as one of my tweets said:

"for all of you offended by my anti-apple tirades: think of me as hitler on hannukah. and thank god nerve gas is illegal. peace out!"

Saturday, June 06, 2009

losing my roots

today morning, a few of my colleagues, in concert with hariyali (an ngo dedicated to environmental conservation and awareness) went to thane for a sapling creation drive.

it was supposed to go on from 8 to 11:30 or so.

at 10 am I was down and out with:

a blister in my palm from the digging

a headache from the sun

a pukish feeling from the smell of manure

and I come from a family that's been traditionally engaged in farming.

ps: post typed with my left thumb on the touchscreen, while standing at the door of a superfast train. a first of sorts!

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

let's trash some houses...maybe even drown some people!

my mom has some very strange philosophies in life. like just now she exhorted me to pray that "it rains heavily, we have floods, and it gets cool"

i asked her why she wanted floods. i wouldn't pray that some poor people lose their homes and belongings, some maybe even their lives, unless i had a very good reason to do so :D

apparently (and i'm not making this up!) mom feels it only gets cool when there are floods.

die, people...die!!! i'm sacrificing you all for the cause of better weather :D

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

conversations i'd rather not

i've noticed one weird thing about women close to me. they love to put me on phone calls with people they enjoy talking to. without warning. ignoring my protests. and strangely, it's always been their boyfriends, moms, brothers. never their hot friends.

(in a movie theater line, waiting to buy our tickets)
k = me
a = my friend
s = a's boyfriend

(a's phone rings)
a: (on the phone) hello, hold on a sec.
a: here, talk.
k: what?
a: talk to him!
k: talk to whom?
a: my boyfriend!!!
k: you want me to talk to your boyfriend?
a: ya!!!
k: i think he'd rather talk to you
a: no! i told him to call now because i want him to talk to you!
k: what?
a: cmon, he's waiting!!!
k: but i don't even know his name!!!
a: his name is s!!! cmon now!!!
k: uhhhh
a: now!!!
k: uhhhh okay
k: (on the phone) hello?
s: hi dude
k: hi...wassup
s: nothing've you been?
k: pretty okay i guess
(making throat cutting gestures to a)
s: so how's things out there?
k: pretty busy. work's hectic, as always.
(making violent throat cutting gestures to a)
k: and how about you?
s: yeah, same here. you know how it is. so which movie?
(trying to stick my tongue out and making a dead expression at a)
a: (loudly) show gimme the phone
s: okay man, i'll talk to you later. you take care!
k: yeah man, you too...bye.
a: (taking phone from me) okay bye, i'll call you later.

i'm saying it out loud now. i don't mind making small talk when i'm introduced to someone, or say if we're sitting down and having a beer together (usually only happens with their boyfriends, i guess :P), but giving me your phone and saying: "here. talk." is about the only thing that can make me lose my (otherwise rock-steady) composure. please don't!!! really.

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